I am fiercely loyal. Almost to a fault. I will let almost anything slide. Except for two things. Lies. And being fake.
As I approach my mid-thirties I feel even more empowered to just be myself.
I’ve been myself for a VERY long time. Annoyingly so, I’m sure.
I have many opinions about many things. And I’m not afraid to share them. I love a good debate.
Knives sharpen knives, and the same goes for thoughts, intelligence and well, friendship.
In my younger years, I was not the most popular. Sometimes I cared, but for the most part, I was perfectly content living in my own world. Doing what I wanted to do whether it was “cool” or not. I had a very small group of friends and that was just fine by me.
In fact, I still am friends with several of my friends from my high school years. Even when I literally don’t have anything in common with these people anymore, I still remain a friend. Remember, fiercely loyal.
So, maybe this is me being extremely naive, but I hold others to my standard of friendship. And when I find that someone who is supposed to be my friend is anything but, it truly disgusts me to my core.
I’m too damn old to have “friends.” I don’t care what anyone thinks about me. Trying to please everyone is exhausting and fake. I am too old to play games. To have someone talk about me behind my back and give me a hug at the same time.
And I HATE fake!
I am not a friend who simply adds you to increase my number of followers on Facebook. I am not a friend who invites you over to see my big house, or my new car or my expansive wardrobe. Nope. (Also, I have none of those things)
I am a friend you can call at any hour of the day or night if you need. I am a friend who will stick by your side even when your ship is sinking. I am a friend who will tell you that you’re being a dummy and then give you a hug because we’ve all been big dummies.
Am I perfect? Not a chance.
That is why I need fiercely loyal and far from fake friends too.
It is so easy for us as women to cut each other with our knives instead of sharpening. We fall into this vicious cycle of cutting instead of empowering. It sucks to hear when I’ve hurt someone. It SUCKS! But it also makes me a better person and a better friend.
Being on the island of perfect is a very lonely place to be. Especially since it doesn’t exist.
So, here I am with all of my flaws. I am who I am and I’m not apologizing for it. Fiercely loyal and far from fake, that’s who I’ll always be.