Women often say it was the best day of their life. For me it wasn’t, and I think it’s ok if it wasn’t the best day of your life. It doesn’t define you as a mother.
I’m taking about the day you give birth. I planned a water birth with minimal drugs. There would be music and I would get to experience giving birth.
My son was 2 weeks late. Yes, 14 WHOLE DAYS. I was booked in to be induced, but it had been made clear by my midwife that my body wasn’t ready to give birth. He was my first baby. I didn’t know that I could have waited and refused induction. I didn’t know that induction doesn’t always work. Nobody prepared me for how much induction would HURT!
11 hours into the induction my body had not dilated at all. Yep you heard right. Back-to-back intense contractions, fueled by the drugs that were pumped into my body, had got me exactly nowhere. I wasn’t closer to meeting my baby and I was exhausted. When they told me I was having a cesarean section I was relieved.
After almost 2 full days in hospital my perfect little baby was born at 3am. Then at 5am they sent my husband home, and I was alone with this hungry little bundle who I didn’t really know yet. He didn’t know how to nurse and neither did I. I wanted desperately to sleep, but I also wanted to cuddle my new baby who I had waited so long to meet. I wanted to drink in his perfect face and smooth his soft hair. The overwhelming feeling of love was amazing, but so was the fear and exhaustion!
It wasn’t the best day of my life…
I was definitely the most life changing day of my life though! My son is incredible. That little boy is driven, fun, and sassy. He has changed our lives immeasurably, and we adore him. His birth prepared me for the birth of my second son, which was much easier. We knew what was coming!
People have asked me if I am disappointed I didn’t get to give birth. Nah. My lady bits are unchanged and I safely delivered 2 healthy boys. That’s all that really matters.
So it wasn’t the best day of my life. It was certainly the making of the rest of my life!